Deep Roller

Tiny bird, all alone
Where are your wings?
Deep breaths and take my hand
As we fall down from the sky

Land in the gutter
Bruised and battered and broken inside
Black and burnt feathers all around me
Such a filthy mess

Kicked to the curb
Snow so soft and cold on my lashes
Drifting past my tear-frozen cheeks
Shivering and numb

Tossed out the door
Treasured memories thrown out behind me
Bent over to gather up what I can
Shaking from the stress

Dropped on the floor
Arms wrapped around me to soften the blow
Curling up tighter but already so small
Aching all over

Smashed against the wall
Bite my tongue and forced to swallow the blood
Teeth rattled loose and my lips quivering
Scared to raise my head

Left all alone
Even a desperate call goes unanswered
No friendly voice and no place to stay
No right path to take

Little bird, all alone

Where are your wings?
Deep breaths and take my hand
As we fall down from the sky

Give Me Wings

I feel locked inside my soul

Sealed for all eternity

No spell or incantation

Will ever release me

I yearn for the stars

To discover everything

Both known and not

And never return

I want to slip beyond

The fabric of this existence

Become dust and ether

Time ceasing to exist

I ache to be part of every story

To learn magic and transform

Journey on an adventure

See where it leads me

I wish to be important

For destiny to unfold around me

Ancient prophecies foretelling my coming

Some purpose that awaits me

Treatment

Yesterday, I said good-bye for the very last time

And now today, I’m looking at the scattered pieces of my life

Picking up the shards to start putting them back together

Because I meant the words I said

And I meant those tears I cried

The plans that I smashed against a wall

This life of ours I turned my back on

Yesterday, I took my key back and locked the door

And now today, I open the windows to let in the sunshine

Breathing in the fresh air that enters with you now gone

Because I meant the words I said

And I meant those tears I cried

The plans that I smashed against a wall

This life of ours I turned my back on

Yesterday, I erased your messages and blocked your number

And now today, I pack up the last of your boxes to send over

Cleaning up every last part of you that remains here

Because I meant the words I said

And I meant those tears I cried

The plans that I smashed against a wall

This life of ours I turned my back on

Yesterday, I lit the incense to burn your scent away

And now today, I light some candles to enjoy their warm glow

Watching the flames as they dance across my memories

Because I meant the words I said

And I meant those tears I cried

The plans that I smashed against a wall

This life of ours I turned my back on

Yesterday, I cut your cancer right out of me

Now today, I’ve finally stitched myself back together

Creating something new and stronger and wiser

Because I meant the words I said

And I meant those tears I cried

The plans that I smashed against a wall

This life of ours I turned my back on

Wonderland

One thousand and one

Still many more times to count

The snowflake’s beauty

Formula

We are stardust and sublime

Priceless and fragile, our cores of iron

To be heated and tempered and chilled

We are plague and pestilence

Death and triumph, our souls of war

To be fought and defied and gloried

We are eternity and ancient

Protected and sheltered, our hearts of history

To be preserved and taught and learned

We are fate and future

Reckless and stunning, our feats of magic

To be dreamed of and encouraged and admired

12.12.2015

“The moment we stop believing we’re immortal is the moment of our deaths.”

Return to Sender - Prologue

Return to Sender

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Prologue:

Everything all started when a small, unmarked package arrived mysteriously during the night.

In the morning, I found it sitting on my kitchen table when I went to make coffee. The wrapping paper was brown and plain, unadorned with any address or postage. The only writing on it was a short missive: ‘Return to Sender’. The message was written out in a pretty cursive across the top in red ink.

Needless to say, I was surprised and confused by this strange package’s sudden appearance. What was I supposed to do with this? Even more importantly, how had it appeared inside my apartment without me knowing? A quick internet search while the coffee was brewing didn’t yield me any answers. The post office didn’t sound like they’d touch it without some sort of proof of postage.

It seemed so personal, too. Not necessarily in a good way, either. My eyes couldn’t help darting to the front door, and I resigned myself to a thorough check around my home to make sure no windows were broken anywhere. There was nothing out of place, though. Nothing but that package.

Eventually, I decided to pour myself a drink and then sit down at my table and just open it, get rid of the suspense. I grabbed a knife, but it almost wasn’t necessary. The paper parted easily, and within was a small and light box barely longer than the width of my hand. It was a pretty red-brown that I assumed meant it was made from some kind of cherry wood. On the top was carved some designs that looked almost like an intricate Celtic knot, and when I lifted the box up to peer closer, I saw a tiny keyhole on one side.

An investigation of the discarded wrapping yielded nothing else, though. No key, and no note. Disappointed, I gingerly shook the box, turning it over to see if there was anything taped on the bottom. While I definitely heard something moving around inside, I still couldn’t see any way to easily open it. I pressed my fingers against the sides, wondering if it was one of those puzzle boxes, but no clever latches formed along the edges. The design on the top remained the same. After a few minutes, I carefully set it back down, feeling let down that I couldn’t seem to open it, and a hundred times more curious than before. On my way to get a second cup of coffee, I resolved to somehow solve the little box’s mysteries.

Though I couldn’t have known it at the time, the box would reveal its secrets to me all on its own, and I would regret learning them forever. The arrival of that box was the beginning of everything, the start of a war that would tear apart a world I didn’t even know existed back then, a war that would later become known as ‘The Seven Years of Blood’.