Once Again

I refuse to apologize once again
I refuse to feel shame once again
I refuse to cry when you put me down
I refuse to turn my head to the ground

There’s so much you taught me
About hating myself and everyone else
How to swallow all my fears
How to ignore all my tears

These lessons will never leave
No matter how much time has passed
I will always feel the echo of this time
No escaping the sharp pain I feel here

I refuse to apologize once again
I refuse to feel shame once again
I refuse to cry when you put me down
I refuse to turn my head to the ground

I can’t even escape in my dreams
Curl up tight and wish you away
Doesn’t ever happen, though
Hear your voice call out to me

Hard to see anything else when
I’m drowning in this nightmare
You sink your claws in even tighter
Drawing blood and creating scars

I refuse to apologize once again
I refuse to feel shame once again
I refuse to cry when you put me down
I refuse to turn my head to the ground

I refuse to apologize once again
I refuse to feel shame once again
I refuse to cry when you put me down
I refuse to turn my head to the ground