Impossible

Sometimes I feel like the life I want

Is nothing but impossible
There’s no way to achieve my dreams
It’s really too impossible

I wake up
And I think of all the many things
I’ve never even accomplished
Then I want to stay in my bed

But I get up
I make myself pull back the sheets
And face whatever this new day’s
Going to bring, one more time

It’s really hard
To actually walk out the door when
I know that my life’s such a mess
And there’s no way to fix it right now

Sometimes I feel like the life I want
Is nothing but impossible
There’s no way to achieve my dreams
It’s really too impossible

Trying more
Is never as easy as they make it sound
When I’m already trying my hardest
And I know that it’s still not enough

Going forward
When nothing’s ever worked out before
Is like pulling against gravity to try and fly
Nowhere to go but eventually fall down

Giving up
Sounds really awful, but there’s no choice
When you try everything and nothing works
And you have to keep rebuilding from that

Sometimes I feel like the life I want

Is nothing but impossible
There’s no way to achieve my dreams
It’s really too impossible

Keep it up
Even when your life’s busy crashing down
And you can’t see if there’s a way ahead
Have faith that you can get through this

Sometimes I feel like the life I want
Is nothing but impossible
There’s no way to achieve my dreams
It’s really too impossible

Sometimes I feel like the life I want

Is nothing but impossible
But there’s always a way to achieve my dreams
Because nothing’s really too impossible

Over You

You called me up out of the blue

And asked me if I wanted to see you
You told me that you missed my smile
And wanted to know if I missed yours too

But I’m not the same person you knew
Five years ago, five months ago
I’m not the same person I was
Five minutes ago, five seconds ago

It used to be I wanted nothing more
Than to hear your voice once again
It used to be you could reach out
And I’d blindly grab onto your hand

But I’m not the same person you knew
Five years ago, five months ago
I’m not the same person I was
Five minutes ago, five seconds ago

I’m not that same old acquaintance
Who made time for you no matter what
I’m different from the reliable friend
Whose door you could knock on any hour

You can’t rely on me anymore

When you’re feeling lonely and needy
You’ll have to find somebody else
To listen to all your grievances

I’m not the same person that you knew
Five years ago, five months ago
I’m not the same person that I was
Five minutes ago, five seconds ago

There’s too much that I don’t want back
I don’t want to hear what you have to say
There’s too much hurt buried in our past
For me to give you the time of day, anymore

Because I’m not the same person you knew
Five years ago, five months ago
And I’m not the same person I was
Five minutes ago, five seconds ago

I’m not the same person you knew
Five years ago, five months ago
I’m not the same person I was
Five minutes ago, five seconds ago

I’m a new me and I’m over you

In the Dark - Part 3

I’m done.

I can’t move around any longer. My feet are blistered, with weeping and cracked soles. My throat is dry, my tongue thick in my mouth.

There’s water not too far away, if I remember correctly, only an hour or so of walking distance. I feel like instead it’s across an impassible breach. My legs are shaking from the constant strain they’ve been under, even though I’m lying here in the dirt for now, gazing up at the bright sun. It’s been so hot lately.

Except for at night. The temperature always drops when the sun goes down. When the trembling of the earth starts.

-------------------------------

Want to know what happens next? Check out the full and edited story here on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FVY71NW.

Reflection

You hurt me so much more 

Than I ever thought was possible
It hurts so bad that I really almost
Want to curl up and die right now

Why did you have to say those things
So hurtful and spiteful and full of pain
Was it fun to watch me flinch back
See me cringe as you cut each wound

The funny thing is I never knew before
That you were capable of this anger
I let my guard down and relaxed
Only to have you turn on me now

I don’t know what it is I’ve done
That would make you hate me this way
But is your compassion all used up
That you couldn’t even try to be kind

These tears won’t stop coming
Because there’s nothing else
I can’t stop you from hurting me
I can’t make you love me again

What happened that changed your mind
Did I somehow make you into this person
Who could do all of these hurtful things
Do I only have myself to blame

These tears won’t stop coming
Because there’s nothing else
I can’t stop you from hurting me
I can’t make you love me again

I don’t know what it is I’ve done
That would make you hate me this way
But is your compassion all used up
That you couldn’t even try to be kind

The funny thing is I never knew before
That you were capable of this anger
I let my guard down and relaxed
Only to have you turn on me now

Why did you have to say those things
So hurtful and spiteful and full of pain
Was it fun to watch me flinch back
See me cringe as you cut each wound

You hurt me so much more 

Than I ever thought was possible
It hurts so bad that I really almost
Want to curl up and die right now

You & Me

This was nothing but a mistake

Me and you
And I can do nothing but regret
Me and you

Every breath I take is another one
That’s tainted by what we have done
And I can’t believe it’s come to this
That we‘ve made such a bad mistake

We never should have said yes
Me and you
There’s no chance now to repent
Me and you

Can’t even look at your face anymore
Without feeling like the worst sort of friend
Now I want to erase you from my life
And pretend that we never met before

Should have known not to touch
Me and you
Don’t look each other in the eyes
Me and you

Everyone will know what we have done
The minute we finally walk out that door
Our secret will be bared to the world
When we lower our eyes in shame

Could have said no anytime
Me and you
Knew better than to continue
Me and you

This pain is going to haunt me forever
I’ll never escape how much it hurts
Because I didn’t have the sense to leave
I should have pushed you away from the start

We were never meant to be

You and me
This can’t ever happen again
You and me